Safe (?) Space

I spent the past week teaching some Movement and Dance Classes for the Young Company at Merrimack Repertory Theatre in Lowell, MA. The first day I taught a short, beginner combination to “The Room Where It Happens” from Hamilton. The kids were very excited to get to dance to something that was, in their words, “so lit.” If I could just get them to stop singing along with all of the lyrics while they dance....but that’s for another day. 

The second day, before we started, a gathered them into a circle and asked them about their opinions, observations, experiences from the day befor and one young girl quickly raised her hand. 

Student: “I was so excited that I went home and told my brother that I learned a new dance to Hamilton!”

Me: Awesome! What did he say? 

Student: He laughed at me and then he was, like, “Nobody cares about that. That’s stupid.”

Me: How did that feel?

Student:  I mean, he does that all the time.  

Me: Did you feel safe? 

Student: Well, I mean I know he loves me...so I guess. 

This exchange got me thinking about a lot. It’s very easy to point out when someone outside of our circle is overtly being a creative naysayer, shuttling down an idea, saying something is never gonna happen, etc. It’s so much harder to see those actions when they are coming from someone who loves us. It can be anyone. It can be a co-worker, an assistant, a partner, a wife, a husband, a brother. You get it. 

This person loves, respects, and/or values us. So it can make it much harder to see. But it’s still there. Do we have to build a strong creative constitution? Yes. Absolutely. But you cannot build that without support.  When we are young (and young doesn’t necessarily mean age. It can mean young in a particular career) our creative energy can be extinguished by the harsh words or thoughts expressed by others....especially those we love.